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Home of more jokes and funny stories than you can shake a stick at!

1.) What do you call an eternity?   Four Blondes in four cars at a four way stop.

2.) Why do Blondes have TGIF written on their shoes?   Toes Go In First.

3.) Three Blondes were driving to Disneyland. After being in the car for four hours they finally saw a sign that said Disneyland Left so they turned around and went home.

4.) What do SMART Blondes and UFO's have in common?   You always hear about them but never see them.

5.) What did the Blonde say when she opened the box of Cheerios?  Oh look, Daddy...Doughnut seeds.

6.) Why did the Blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice?   Because it said concentrate.

7.) Why do blondes always smile during lightning storms? They think their picture is being taken.

8.) How can you tell when a Blonde sends you a fax?  It has a stamp on it.

9.) Why can't Blondes dial 911?  They can't find the 11 on the phone!

10.) What do you do if a Blonde throws a pin at you?   Run, she's got a grenade in her mouth!

11.) How can you tell if a Blonde has been using your computer?  There is white-out all over the monitor.

12.) Why shouldn't Blondes have coffee breaks?  It takes too long to retrain them.

13.) A brunette goes to the doctor and as she touches every part of her body with her finger she says, Doctor it hurts everywhere. My leg hurts, my arm hurts, my neck hurts, and even my head hurts! The doctor asks, Where you ever a Blonde?
Yes I was. she replies. why do you ask?
The doctor answers, because your finger is broken!

14.) A Blonde and a brunette were walking outside when the brunette said, Oh look at the dead bird.  The Blonde looked skyward and said, Where, where?

15.) A brunette is standing on some train tracks, jumping from rail to rail, saying 21 21 21.  A Blonde walks up, sees her and decides to join her. She also starts jumping from rail to rail, saying 21 21 21. Suddenly, the brunette hears a train whistle and jumps off the tracks just as the Blonde is splattered all over the place. The Brunette goes back to jumping from rail to rail , counting 22 22 22

16.) How do you drown a Blonde?  Put a scratch  sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.

17.) Why does it take longer to build a Blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one?
You have to hollow out the head.

18.) How do you get a twinkle in a Blonde's eye?  Shine a flashlight in her ear.

19.) Why don't Blondes like making KOOL-AID? Because they can't fit 8 cups of water in the little packet.

20.) Did you hear about the two Blondes that were found frozen to death  in their car at the drive-in movie theater?  They went to see Closed for Winter.

21.) Why won't they hire Blondes as pharmacists? They keep breaking the prescription bottles in the typewriters.

{continued in Blondes 2}